RV's: They're not just for rednecks anymore

Traveling with small people is not fun. And by "not fun" I mean a complete and utter nightmare of the worst kind. A couple of months ago we took a road trip to Idaho for Paul's brother's graduation. While it was great to see Paul's familly the journey was not ideal. For example, at one point in the trip, we were pulled over on the side of the road and I was out of the truck yelling "I hate your face!" at Paul. Not my finest moment, but fairly representative of the driving experience. I dealt with the stress by shopping at every rest stop. "What do you guys do here? Opals? I'll take a ring. Silver? Why not an ice bucket with matching scoop." It was an expensive trip on many levels.

Experiences like this are why I have a policy of generally NOT going further than 5 miles from home with my kids. However, I have been SO curious to try traveling in an RV. So when Paul suggested going to Winthrop, WA for a mountain biking festival I said I would do it if we rented an RV. (Never heard of Winthrop? Exactly.)

Let me tell you, it was great. I will break it down for you in a compare/contrast of traditional road trip and RV road trip.

Category 1: STUFF
Note: I have determined that number of suitcases is inversely proportional to size of human being. The average American is 5 ft 6 1/2 inches. Therefore if the average person needs 1 suitcase that means that Andrew needs roughly 2 and a half suitcases and our whole family needs 6 suitcases. This formula is so accurate, I am working on getting this theory considered for the Nobel Prize in Mathematics.

Normal road trip: Load, unload and rifle through 6 different suitcases looking for what you need at every rest stop and hotel. Many things, once packed, are never seen again.

RV road trip: Everything is organized and put away in your little moving apartment before you even leave your driveway. You have what you need and you know where it is the entire length of your trip.

Category 2: FOOD

Normal road trip: Wake up, small people start throwing themselves on the floor "I'm huuuuuuuuuuungry!!" You shove Nutrigrain bars at them while you pack up your stuff and try to find a restaurant nearby in a town you don't know. You go in the restaurant, pour over the menu to see what you can get for the kids and order $12 worth of food which they don't eat, don't like, and throw at the wig of the older lady at the table next to you while screaming like they are being stabbed (when in reality they are not being stabbed but simply being encouraged to eat a bite of a totally normal pancake). You then have T-90 seconds to cram all of your food in your mouth before they hit Defcon 1 and you are asked to leave. You get to repeat this at every meal and snack.

RV road trip: Wake up, small people start throwing themselves on the floor "I'm huuuuuuuuuuungry!!" You open the fridge, get out some food and make them exactly what they like to eat for breakfast. Then you finish your breakfast in peace while the kids play. Repeat this at every meal and snack, no matter where you happen to be.

Category 3: Accomodations and Recreation

Normal road trip: You get to stay at hotel or motel which never has a crib in your room when you arrive even though you told them ten times in advance that you need one. Once your child goes to bed you get to turn off all the lights and then lay completely still in the dark praying the light of your cell phone doesn't keep them awake. For fun, your child can play with the ice machine, sit quietly in the lobby, or get a martini at the hotel bar. All great options for a 2-year-old.

RV road trip: Everything you need for sleeping is ready to go (see "Stuff" section) and you just pull into a parking spot at a campground. When the kids go to sleep, you can close the divider in the RV and shower, read, watch movies on your computer, or "other stuff." For fun, your child can run around, play on the playground equipment, go swimming, throw rocks at a tree, or get an ice cream from the little office store.

I think you get the gist of what I'm saying here. We actually had a fun trip and I liked Paul's face the whole time. I highly recommend it!!